My Adorable Cat Chewy

I can't get over the fact that my cat Chewy is so cute! Ha ha I don't think an owner other than Matthew and I have ever been so proud of what a hansom cat we have. He wasn't always as cute as he is now though. When we first found him he was only about a week old, along with his other sisters and brothers that were underneath a desk outside. We bottle raised the four kittens and took care of them as if we were their biological mothers. Chewy was the UGLIEST out of all of them when he was little. He was scroungier and quite smaller, and always would "chew" ( how he was given his name) on the bottle instead of drink the milk. He was also the hardest one to keep alive because he was so weak. My brother developed a strong heart for him and, since my mom thought he was so ugly and no one for sure would want him, we decided to keep him. After time passed and he became older, he slowly became a very beautiful cat with a pretty coat.  I guess he was just like a caterpillar that became a beautiful butterfly!

FINALS!!!

Wow how I have  been stressing out about finals!!! It seems to never end I feel as if I am a never ending work machine. It seems to me that this is the one time in the year ( other than the occasional tests or essays that happen to be due on the same day ) where teachers choose to all cram as much as they can in all at once. Of course, to prepare us for finals in the semester, but it is all so crazy! Sometimes I just feel so over my head with work,work,work!

Just As Planned

Unfortunately my birthday did turn out how I suspected, just not as bad. Do you ever notice how sometimes before something happens you always try to infer and it ends up being just big over exaggeration? That is sort of the result of my birthday. I was ecstatic about the yearly supply of makeup that I receive and all of the beautiful eye colors and what not, but it wasn't exactly right. Sixteen is always suppose to be one of the biggest, but it wasn't that at all.  I was constantly rushing to go here, and to go there, that I never really relaxed. One thing that I think everyone deserves on their birthday is to just sit down and not have a worry in the world because it's your birthday! 

Not So Sweet Sixteen

So my birthday is tomorrow and honestly, I think this is going to be one of my worst. Today was just hard enough with all of my work for finals, but tomorrow seems to be even more stressful. Turning sixteen doesn't seem all that great as it seems, and I am really disappointed. I wanted to spend my birthday with my brother, but instead he has to attend a meeting and I have practice for choir. I feel really depressed thinking about how my birthday will be. Out of all of the days that is the one that is suppose to be special for my brother and I, and it doesn't really seem special at all to me. :(

Lorita Is The Best!!

I just can't keep this to myself any longer. I have never thanked Lorita, but I think on thanksgiving she should have been there so I could give her a tight hug and thank her for caring so much. I'm sure many people feel this way, but she has went above and beyond to read many of my blogs and replied to my insights and feelings.  Even though I understand how busy each any everyone of our lives can be, she continues to squeeze time and show enthusiasm in each of her responses to my entries. Just when I thought a person could really not possibly be so genuine and loving, she continues to prove me wrong. I look up to you and one day hope to be as gentle and kind to people. So Lorita if you read this thank you so much for all you have done! Your responses give me hope at times and just continues to remind me of how great and wonderful a person you are! Much Love

Seperation

A day or two ago my mother got the news that the foreign exchange program, in which my brother signed up for, wants to interview him as well as my family. I am both overjoyed and sadly depressed at the same time. If they accept him, that means he will have a year to grow and explore a whole new world in Spain. But at the same time if they accept him that means we will be seperated from me from a whole year. I could never imagine life without my brother by my side. We were meant to stick together; and have never been apart for a long  period of time let alone a year. It seems like this will be the first step of a new beginning and chapter of my brother's life. It is also a dip in the water of truly branching into my own person as well. Since we were small I have always followed and been  a little shadow to my brother in any and everyway. I've looked up to him even though we are almost exact in age. His opinion is one that I truly do take into consideration when doing anything. I don't know how I am going to live without him without falling apart or cracking but I am going to try my best. This to me seems like just a preperation for when we are out of school and have to go our own ways and part to colleges and such. But, it won't take away the fact of how much I will really miss him through the time he is gone. Love you chur

That Much More Older

Just today I realized that I am going to be sixteen in eight days. Am I excited? Of course. Am I scared though? Hell yes. I'm that much closer to being on my own. I'm that much closer to paying my own bills, buying my own everything, and worrying about actual important things. And I'm that much closer to facing the real world. It is amazing how fast time really does past by when you aren't paying much attention to it. And everyday I get closer and closer to facing this world on my own. I'm excited though too because it means I'm that much closer to being on my own. In such a way that there are no restrictions, no strict rules or curfews. No more of those frequent interrogating  questionnaires." Who? What? Where ? Why?" Closer and closer to freedom.

Being Thankful

I'm sure everyone enjoyed the great food that is served at Thanksgiving. The yams with toasted marshmallows on top, tarty cranberry sauce, mash potatoes with homemade gravy, and of course turkey. But beside the food, this year I really looked at the overall special day. As I sat at the table glaring at the food my mother and grandmother had slaved over the stove all day to prepare, I looked up and viewed every person. My sister to the far right of me, picking at lint my mother had on her who was to the left. To the far left was my older brother, sitting with his had on his fork ready to devour his meal. And right to my left and right next to me was my grandmother and my bother, Matthew. ( Down stairs were the kids and my brother and sister in-laws as well as my Dad and Uncle.) I truly do appreciate each and every person that was there. I looked at what each of them do for me and how grateful I am to have them in my life... I love them all so much and sometimes I think I do take advantage of how lucky I am. This year it wasn't only the food that hit me... but the love throughout the room that reminded me of what a great family that I have.

Repercussion

Repercussion. It really does eat dirt when all you do is sit in boredom. I put it upon myself though. It all was the result of an action that I should have never done. On Wednesday if I would have just controlled my anger and let the rumor he had said about me go, I wouldn't be in the spot I am right now. I would be off to Camp Cambell with everyone else that signed up to be a cabin leader having no worry in the world. I hate the fact that I feel like I have no control over myself. I am a happy person don't get me wrong, but when I am angry it's like I have no way of stopping this beast inside of me.. So now I'm just sitting here bored out of my mind, plenty of time to spend thinking about what I had done.. How it wasn't worth it at all. Having something on my record, facing groundation, and worst of all disappointed in myself.