Simply A Coward

My pops told me about a rich man that he  knew of who flew all the way to Africa for his interior for his million dollar show race car. The price money wise was a total of 500,00 dollars, but soul wise was priceless. This man was not retrieving and old upolstery; he flew to shoot and bring back two elephant skin's and their tusks.( ivory) It isn't fair that a fat inconsiderate man can ENJOY his fancy race car while two innocent elephant's skins cushion him and his caviar liquor-sipping friends  unworthy rumps. It makes me sick. Completely sick to my stomach. Those kind of people make me hate the rich. I don't hate people, because it is a strong word, but I HATE rich. He simply did this not to increase the speed or his chance of winning the race, for this had NOTHING to do with that. It had to do with his arrogance and show boating what e could get with his millions. There is no sense of fairness in this man. The only way that I could see this would be fair is if it was a one on one battle. Man against Elephant. But instead like the weakling, as well as every other endangered species hunter, he holds a gun from a distance and brings down these strong, beautiful animals for no other reason but to embellish his car.  To me he is nothing but a COWARD. I feel like writing a complaint about this man to some kind of group against hunting for furs or skins or an endangered species group because he should be punished. It is people like this who make the chances more and more slim of there being any hopes for endangered animals in the future.

Where Did It Begin

Where did the creation of words even begin? Languages are beautiful. They are one thing that connects a certain group or region of people; that holds the community together. But where did it start? I try and think about how it all began.. I mean was it just with clicks back in the cavemen day, or Uh's... or was it actual words? The vibration in that voice box is a gift. I love the ability to speak and communicate with one another. If we ourselves all only knew our own language, the world would be full of tears.  There would be no true way to get a point across, or for you to read what I'm writing now. But we have something in common. A language. A dialect. That of which I am very thankful for. It's amazing how in other countries our language is gibberish, but to us it makes complete sense and vis versa. But it's even more amazing to me that the brain is able to obtain not only one, but multiple different languages. The amount of languages and dialects continues on and on, and many are still being explored and created, but  no matter how many, they are part of the substances that hold all of us together.

 I hope good people really do get rewarded in life. Even if it was only 9 dollars, she smiled like it was a million. :) and even if it was only a ten minute walk to deliver, I would have walked a mile just to see that rewarding smile. I hope those great people do get rewarded in life, because they reward me just being in my life. 

Noooo..... YYEESSSS!

My brother and I as kids had  A Night at the Roxbury memorized line for line. But now that I'm a couple years older, I actually understand some of the mature humor in the film. It's crazzy watching a movie that I had inscribed in my mind and could resight without flaw and 5 years later finally understanding parts of the movie I never had before. I never really established why this movie was a classic for me and Chur.. Doug and Steve Butabi walking around in their revealing black bathing suits, constant sexual reference that our pure young minds couldn't even comprehend, and hideous obnoxious 90's outfits; I couldn't possibly get why this movie would even interest us. But these two brothers had something in common that  me and Chur also had that no one else does. The secret language. It's like my brother and I have this code where no one is able to understand but us. We can say one word and know exactly what we are talking about, but everyone else looks clueless and baffled.

What if we all....

were built like cats? I was cleaning my room and my cat jumped on my bed, curling up into a little ball to take a nap. It amazes me how simple it is for them to reach their legs behind their ears to tackle an itchy spot. And the way they walk on all fours is kind of interesting too. I always try and wonder what if we were made to walk on all fours. Holding a pencil wouldn't be so easy anymore to write and dressing might not be that simple either. On the positive, we would have impeccable balance. We would also be extremely flexible. It's just crazy imagining how different our lives would be if we were able to walk on all fours. The countless possibilities we could reach with all four that we never could with just two, but also lose some of our most favorite everyday actions that are valued.

The Bus

I asked my best friend the other day the simplest question. "How's life?" I mean it usually doesn't get any more complicated than that; as well as the answers. They basically consist of a "Oh, life is good" , or a " Yea pretty slow right now," or something like that. But his answer made me frown. He told me.., " I guess I'm just watching it pass by." I questioned why he said it in such a depressing way. And his reply was, " Life is like a bus, it comes and it goes. Sometimes you just gotta keep going because life ain't stopping for Nobody..." 

I didn't really know how to reply to that...because it was true. In the same sense that I didn't want to think in a negative way, life doesn't stop. We keep going, and time keeps ticking. But then I realized that that's not what life is all about though. You can either think of things in a pessimistic or optimistic way. So, I smiled and told him ," Yea, that's true.. But you choose the bus you get on right? So it's up to you the way you are going to make it." ~

I Knew I Shouldn't Have Ate All That Pizza.

All school day yesterday I had this horrible stomach ache. I figured it was the amount of greasy, cardboard pizza from Chucky Cheese I had ate and the gulps of Root beer I drank at 7:20. I couldn't wait for lunchtime to hopefully pass my irritated stomach. Fifth period came, and it became unbearable; I knew everything that was in there was going to come right back out. By the time sixth period came all I could think of was when I was going to get out of the classroom. Nothing else. When the bell rang I ran to the bathroom, and sure enough, I was right. I felt relieved.. but as soon as I came home, out again. All day yesterday was just a throw-up frenzy as it never stopped. I became weak and wasn't looking forward to eating anything. Hopefully today will be a little easier.. and the food will stay down. I guess it's just the little flu bug that jumped into my mouth and now it's my turn. 

  One thing that I found very interesting was actually how amazing the human body is. Yesterday I realized that instead of just waking up and throwing up everywhere, it works sort of like an alarm. Every time I woke up, I was able to rush to the bathroom and relieve myself. I think it's interesting that you're body will warm you in a way to get up and actually prepare yourself for the thunder. :/

The Bucket List

I hung out with my uncle today and he was telling me about a movie that he had seen called ,The Bucket List. I have not seen it yet, but it sounds great. He said it was about two men that had met in a hospital and both were going to die. One had a brain tumor ( or something of that sort) and the other had cancer. One night they wrote a list of things that they wanted to accomplish before they " kicked the bucket." In this list included traveling to certain places around the world, making amends with family, and accomplishing things they never thought they could before. One of the men was loaded with money, and  he decided to take him and this other man to fulfil all of the things on their list. By the end of the movie, they both die happy and complete. I really want to be able to accomplish everything I want to before I die. If knew you were going to die, what would be on your bucket list?

money is replaceable. time isn't.

I wonder the probability of the droplet hitting my hand. Maybe one in ten, or one in a hundred. In a rhythmic pattern they beat unto the ground, splitting and squirming into those ten chances, that hundred. On a lucky moment one might fall upon my hand.. absorbing into the thick layers, seeping into the bone. That hundred is chance, but  time is tight. The greens will come and go, but the clock doesn't stop and before you know it you're looking at your empty hands thinking... ," What the hell did I do. "

Thanks Guys

Man this whole week my happiness just seems to decrease. I tried to encourage myself to keep my head up, but nothing works. Everyone has become even more mad at me.. or disappointed. It's strange because blogger has sort of become my diary; the thing that I can tell everything to. But it's public. All of you can read what I feel, what I think, and how I'm doing. And sometimes its the only thing that can keep my head up. You guys encourage me, lift me up, and remind me to keep going. Thank you everyone who has commented, or read my blogs. It means a lot that even if all these people in my life are mad at me, you guys aren't. It reminds me I'm not alone. That there are people I can see everyday that are still there for me. Much love~

Man...

What am I really suppose to do. When anyone who's ever mattered most in my life is mad at me. When I want to just leave. I don't know where to leave to. But just leave. When the ground below me is crumbling. When all else fails and my emotions are tangling together to make a tight ball in my stomach. When the air becomes thick to breath as the tears stream.

 I remind my self tomorrow is a new day.

I remind myself I will get through this. 

I remind myself that I am strong.

I remind myself they still love me.. no matter what.

Goodnight. For tomorrow is my new start~

Community Service :/

While my brother and other students rack up their community service hours, I sit here lazy and let the time fly by. WHY?? I have NO IDEA! I realized this week that I have to start researching and find ways to earn my hours. It's amazing that all we have is two years left. Two years and we're done with high school, and within those two years ( and the rest of this semester ) I have to earn my hours. I looked online today and found a place downtown that you volunteer to work with kittens. I really hope they will respond because I LOVE animals. I actually thought about becoming a zoo keeper when thinking about what I want to do for my occupation. I also saw another community service opportunity involving painting a couple props for a play. This is another one of my interests because I LOVE to draw. It would be a great way to earn hours and have fun at the same time. I hope they respond because I have get 'em soon!